STRESSED | DESSERTS

So why doesn't that make me feel any better? 

I've been feeling incredibly stressed lately, about most things it feels. Being this stressed resulted in restlessness and a lack of good sleep at night. Now I'm fighting the beginnings of a cold because of it. I've haven't been truly sick in almost a year! Since I quit my last job. Working my old job I was working 10-12 hours a day, constantly stressed, unhappy, and consistently toughing cash and credit cards (read: germs). So when I quit most those stressors went away. 

But when I quit I didn't have another job lined up (oops). I just needed out. I had signed up to do the Seattle Tough Mudder months in advance, and suddenly they were requiring me to work the entire weekend, they wouldn't compromise, just a flat "no" so I put in my notice. When I took the job I currently have I took a MAJOR pay cut! Major. So while I no longer stress about my job, I'm constantly stressing about money. I've gone back to living paycheck to paycheck. No, not even paycheck to paycheck, paycheck to three days before paycheck. People at work ask why don't I just take a day off if I'm sick, and when I answer that I can't afford to be sick they chuckle at me. Like how could that possibly be a thing? But I can't, I have almost no vacation left, which needs to last till the end of the year, I make very little money, and have no savings. So believe me when I say, "I can't afford to be sick."

This is turned into quite the pitty-party hasn't it. I've been looking for other jobs, some pay the same but are closer to home. Some pay more. Some less. I keep turning in applications but haven't heard anything. Some jobs I'm putting off applying for because you don't get vacation or holiday pay for 3+ months, and I already did that last year, I just recently got out of that financial hole. 

I've been feeling like Alexander today. Today has just not been grand, enter this post. I know, I know, things will get better. But right now I want to just wallow in my self pity. I've felt on the verge of tears and just cannot wait for the work day to be over. I need to go home, I need to get a good sweat session in. I need to just put this terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day, behind me.